Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Holiday plans

We have booked a holiday! At Easter, FL and I are off to Applecross in the deeply remote West Highlands. We are staying at a house owned by a Scottish design-shop so everything there is carefully chosen for its beauty and utility, but not so precious as to be intimidating. It is right on the shore, so there are astonishing views across to Raasay and Skye. There isn’t another house for miles. We can walk in the wilds or sit and dream by the fire. The only drawback is that the property is only supplied with well-water, which ought to be boiled before drinking, so FL will have to take his own supply!

We have found it really hard to make plans. Not knowing how his treatment will go, and now not knowing whether its good work will last. We are back at the hospital next Tuesday, and he will learn then whether or not he has taken his last chemo pills for this clinical trial, or if he has one more month to go. And whether or not he has been randomly selected to receive maintenance treatment or not. If not, it is the big scary world of drug-free living until the MM comes back. Which could be very soon …or not very soon, but will definitely happen one day.

Summer is too far ahead to book a holiday – who knows what will be happening by then in the not-so-wonderful world of Multiple Myeloma! The kids are away at Easter so we can go somewhere that suits just the two of us, i.e. in the middle of nowhere!

FL wanted to go to Greece. I wanted to go to Iceland. But he doesn’t qualify for holiday cancellation insurance, never mind travel insurance, so its Scotland for us! This is quite a relief. If anything untoward occurs, I can drive us home and I can speak the language. And the western highlands have become our special place. I can imagine my children’s children’s children tracing their family tree and wondering why we married in Skye. And the reason is really that it feels like coming home for both of us when we arrive on the west coast. I would like to move there one day. Once the kids have left home and FL has... gone. I just hope I don’t get there too soon.

Andre, our virtual MM-blogging “friend” has written a lot recently about seizing the moment before its gone forever. As has Annie. Our marriage is the fulfilment of a long-held promise, but is also in recognition of how short a time we may have left together. It doesn’t matter anymore what other people think about the gap in age between us, or our history. It’s just him and me, grabbing onto our love while we have the chance. Before he dies. Of course, who’s to say it won’t be me who is hit by a bus?! That’s the thing – we know that our time together is limited, so we have to make the most of it, right now. There’s no time to waste!

4 comments:

RooKnits said...

The cottage looks amazing.. I am forwarding a link to Tony straight away. Seize the day. It should be the way everyone lives. Thanks for your good wishes for my mom. She was sitting in a chair having breakfast when my dad called the hospital this morning. I can hardly beleive it. Wishing you and FL all the best.

Penny said...

Looks like you plan on really getting away from civilisation, I hope it is a lovely holiday.

ambermoggie said...

It will be a fabulous break for you both and you will enjoy the place I know:) Sieze every day Ruth and enjoy them all. There will be very many I am sure:)

motopacsman said...

Thank you for linking to my blog. I read yours almost every day.

I celebrate the relationship you and FL share. LOVE is a truly different thing than a social standard. Some people don't understand. Some people do. You cannot concern yourself with the inexperience of others.

I firmly believe that we're put on this earth to make one another happy. Share the time you have together. Enrich both your lives simultaneously.