Friday, July 24, 2009

Project Roobeedoo

I am thoroughly back at work and in need of a holiday already – there is so much stupid office politics at the moment. I don’t usually let it get to me (it’s only a job) but the past week’s events have taken their toll on my sleep, which is no good at all. Thank goodness for knitting, eh?!

Breaks from work tend to inspire me to overhaul my life to some extent. This time I started by clearing out my wardrobe. I was ruthless. Those 1990’s suits I never wear? Out! The battered black shoes I wear almost daily? Out! As a result, there are gaps to be filled and decisions to be made as to the direction of my work wardrobe. Am I going to carry on being the “creative and quirky one” (as commented by a senior manager), or should I heave a great sigh and aim for something more professional? The impending changes in my department put me on precarious ground. Unless I find some energy and enthusiasm to promote myself and my role, I do fear that I will be left without a job, which would be very very silly indeed. Before FL got ill I was pretty career-minded, but I just haven’t had the drive recently. I feel like I am waiting for my caring responsibilities to be over before I can commit fully to my paid employment.

I haven’t mentioned that I will be 45 this year. Not the most obvious landmark birthday, but it feels “big” to me. There will be no more babies, my children are growing up, and realistically I will not have my First Love around for many more years (and that’s on an optimistic day). I have 11 years’ worth of mortgage to pay off on a ramshackle farmhouse. I have waist-length greying plaits. Oh my!

So my knitting has a distinctly therapeutic quality at the moment, while I work things out. The kids are off to London for two weeks, so I have more space, both mentally and physically, to think it all through.

And I have the yarn for a new project! Lovely isn’t it? Manos Silk Blend for the Moonstone jacket from the Knitter Issue 4. More another day.


zombiecazz said...

a job is just a means to an end. Allows us to pay the bills and spend free time crafting. Family are much more important.
Stay quirky!! I miss my quirkiness, still have some, but not as much as I did before.

RooKnits said...

Hmmm. Decisions. I am no help, as I am sitting at work in jeans and a hoodie today. I've come to our Leicester office to take advantage of dress down Friday! The manos is absolutely gorgeous.

tea and cake said...

mid-life crisis, anyone? Look at this as a Good Time! Time to reflect, as you are doing, but time for fresh change. Yes, there are things you will do no longer, but and it's a bit but, there is so much more you can do now and in the future. Good Luck x

Bryony Ramsden said...

1) Screw what anyone thinks about your dress sense. It is you. You keep being you. Or I'll come up there and slap you one.

2) 45 is not big. 45 is a number we made up to count things. If we counted in base 6 instead of base 10, we'd be worrying about different numbers. Numbers only count in knitting, sewing and how much it costs to buy these things :)

3) I'm a scruff at work, and that's not stopped me getting funky little jobs :) and it certainly hasn't stopped some people I've seen at interviews/tours round our place getting them either It's all about you. And you are fab :)

4) yarn is good.