Wednesday, January 13, 2016

Progress

Today was the day when everything happened at once.  Most of it too late to be helpful.

  • the Community Alarm was installed
  • Social Services confirmed he could have a wash once a week from 25 January (!)
  • the District Nurse delivered a commode and a "blue book" for FL's patient notes
  • a brand new shiny "dedicated" GP rang to discuss how FL was feeling today, and pain management...
  • and rang again a little later to say that FL has been allocated a place in the hospice, tomorrow morning
FL slept through most of it.

He stirred at 2.30pm and I managed to tell him about the hospice place, and had a little cry and a cuddle.
Then he slept again until 5.30pm when I proposed late lunch / early dinner so that he might be awake long enough to gather some book-project papers to take in his bag tomorrow.

He ate a little but couldn't concentrate well enough to read.
I printed off the latest draft, ready to pack in the morning.

The nurses have just visited to put him to bed, where I need to join him soon.
Goodnight, everyone.

70 comments:

Knitlass said...

Oh. Thoughts and prayers with you both.

Nic the Pom said...

Sending you both loving thoughts

Nic the Pom said...

Sending you both loving thoughts

Charlotte said...

Oh how wonderful and so very very sad. A cry and a cuddle sounds like the only appropriate response.

Laura said...

I don't normally see these until the next morning, but I'm so glad I can say hello now. I hope you both have a peaceful night, and that all goes smoothly with transfers tomorrow.

Much love xxxx

Carol said...

Thoughts with you both. Hope you sleep well. Xx

Mags said...

Thinking of you both. x

Wakeymakes said...

Love and hugs xXx

Lynn said...

A cry and a cuddle seems the only appropriate response. Praying for strength and peace for you both.

Jenny Larking said...

I hope your evening and night are peaceful. Thinking of you both.

Emma said...

A relief that the hospice place is available, but also very sad. So sad.
Sleep well.Thinking of you both.

Jen said...

Yes, thinking of you both and sending strength and peace. Hope you sleep well. x

Jenni said...

Hugs x

Sew little time said...

Thinkong of you both. X

Sew little time said...

Thinkong of you both. X

Athene said...

Thinking of you. I hope the hospice place will give you some quality time together.

Nina Waters said...

Sending you both the very best wishes. Sleep well.

Redhedhels said...

Hugs and thoughts. Sleep well. Hope tomorrow goes smoothly.

Twelfthknit said...

Best gentle wishes

Te Araroa said...

Wishing courage and love to you both.

Philippa said...

Goodnight. You can see many thoughts are with you xx

Ruth West said...

From a previously `quiet' follower of your journey, my heartfelt wishes that you have the strength to carry on providing FL with the love, care and reassurance that he needs right now. Thinking of you..

Unknown said...

So humbling that you are sharing all of this with us.....

RooKnits said...

Thinking of you Roo. Sending strength for tomorrow. Much love

RooKnits said...

Thinking of you Roo. Sending strength for tomorrow. Much love

Lorna A said...

I can only imagine how hard things must be for you both. It isn't easy to be on either side of what is happening. As a fellow carer I naturally empathise with you Roo, I dread being in a similar situation and can only hope that I appear as dignified as you do. (Weeping and wailing on the blog has been my style in the past.) xx

Mela R. said...

Sending you warm thoughts and a great big virtual hug.

Cherie said...

I'm also continuing to send my warm thoughts and virtual ((hugs)).

Adele Terrill said...

A cry and a cuddle seems about right. I'm pleased things have finally happened for you but it sucks that it has taken so long. Hospice will be a new chapter but hopefully you will find it helps you in these last weeks to just be able to spend some time just being a loving wife, and not nursemaid, cook, laundry lady and everything else you have had to expend so much energy on in the last few months. Take the hard work out of just being together and try and savour what time you have left. Thinking of you lots, sending prayers up for you too.

ambermog said...

Late commenting as we are having similar stuff here. Sending vibes and hugs for you both. You are in my thoughts xx

Suzie said...

Hugs and prayers from Richmond, VA (US). I hope you both have a peaceful night. Rest well!

unlabelled clothes said...

Hello Ruth, Words feels so impotent right now. I'm so sorry. I'm thinking of you both and sending you a hug.

from103 said...

Thinking if you both Sx

Witchknit said...

God Bless

Jackie Dean said...

Thinking of you both and hoping things go smoothly tomorrow. Love, hugs and prayers for you both x

Jane Neave said...

God bless you both xxx

Mog said...

Sending you both a big hug, and hope for a brighter day tomorrow where you can settle back into being able to simply be with one another. Much love.xx

Marie said...

Words cannot describe my admiration for you both...your strength especially in dealing with each of your set of challenges. My thoughts are with you both!xxx

Brenda said...

I'm glad you finally have the medical support you need. I hope you are also getting the emotional support you need - this is a difficult time and you have been soldiering on. Sending my thoughts to both of you!

MaryinTN said...

Love and hugs to you both. Thinking of you and FL.

Miss said...

Thinking of you both, and praying for peace and comfort, and good care.
Has work come through with your extended leave? I hope so.
Shalom x

Mary in Mo said...

Thoughts are with you both. Thank you for sharing so honestly and openly.
The brutality of this disease is so unforgiving, I'm hopeful Hospice gives you both
a chance to just be each other's loves once again if only for a moment.
My husband and I are traveling the same Myeloma road.
My heart breaks for you, I wish you peace.
Mary in Missouri

Unknown said...

My dad died of multiple myeloma twenty years ago, and I feel for every word you write. We were very lucky that there are a lot of us (five sisters) and we took turns helping my mom, especially near the end. Hospice people are wonderful, and they will help you through this very difficult time. It was really hard to say goodbye, but more for us than my dad, who was ready. I hope that the next while is bearable, and that the good thoughts of the friends here help you deal with what is to come. A cry and a cuddle sounds just right.

K.Line said...

I'm so relieved to hear that you have social infrastructure cohering now!

Eileensews said...

Tomorrow will be a long day for you. Take the best care of yourself as you can during this tough time.

sulkycat said...

Thinking of both of you.

tim's wife said...

Sending warm wishes from across the pond. Such a very hard time, but very relieved to hear that he will be where he needs to be and you will not be alone in caring for him. Thinking of you both every day.

Jodie said...

Roo this must be all so hard. I can't imagine. My thoughts and good wishes go with you tomorrow as well

Flossie in Stitches said...

I am so glad you finally have the help so desperately needed but sad for you both too. My thoughts are with you: I hope the hospice brings respite for you both and that you are able to concentrate on loving each other rather than coping with the stress and worry that you have handled so elegantly. Very best wishes Roo. xx

Sarahel said...

Like so many others I checked for news last night - but flaky internet prevented comment - and am thinking of you both this morning , and of what the day will bring, We've has snow overnight so I do hope Aberdeenshire hasn't had too much, to add to your pressures.

Kitkat Krispie said...

I am so glad that, at long last, you are getting the support you should have been receiving ages ago. I hope you managed to get a good nights sleep now that help is actually in place. I am crossing my fingers that nature is on your side today and that all wind, rain and snow will stop giving you both a window for the journey to the hospice. Sending you a big hug and lots of love to support you on the next stage of your journey. A hospice is a place of warmth, love, support and more importantly dignity. A place where you get a bath more than once a week! Safe journey today. x x

Lily M said...

Big hugs and loving thoughts from here

Elizabeth Harrington said...

Thinking of you both and sending heartfelt wishes and prayers, God Bless you

Jen Forsythe said...


So typical that things arrive too late, but glad ( if you can call it that) that a hospice place has come up for FL. Hope today goes ok for you.

Mairead Hardy said...

Thinking of you both this morning. Sending love and hugs.

poppyinstitches said...

think of you both x

pamela said...

Hoping today goes well, and that you get FL comfortably installed. I'm sad for you both, but relieved that you are no longer having to struggle on your own. Maybe now you can share a period of calm and tranquillity together. Weather permitting, of course. Rain, now snow, you've really been up against it. You've coped magnificently with the misadventures of the past few weeks, so positive and caring. Your blanket square is cheering and optimistic. Good wishes to you both.

Lizzi said...

Oh Roo, be big and brave. It’s such difficult time and yo are doing so well.

Sabs said...

Roo I'm only just catching up the last few days now, sounds like you've had a very tough time. I'm glad FL has the hospice bed, you're (hopefully) there right now settling him in. Really hope he has some wonderful care and that you get some rest yourself as well as being able to spend time together. Thinking of you both xx

Taran said...

Oh, I hope things are coming together! Hang in there.

Minigranny said...

Thinking of you both.

PaisleyPirouette said...

Thinking of you two. I am glad you get the help you need now and I hope that you can have some last good time in a supporting ambiance. X

Gillian Hall said...

Much love to you both in this difficult, wearying time. I'm sure you have some very complex emotions but it will be such a relief to know you are not alone and don't have to bear the physical care burden that you have been shouldering so magnificently and bravely. Thinking of, and praying for you both, every day.

Unknown said...

It sounds like you are doing such an amazing job looking after and advocating for your FL. I'm so glad some of the physical burden will hopefully be lifted from you now he has a place in hospice.

I have been reading along but unable to comment. My mum died at the end of the summer. I kept a log of what happened each day, it all seemed to happen so fast and so slow at the same time. You will be glad to have this record to look back on, one day. It is so unbearably sad and I am so sorry that this is happening.

greenmtngirl said...

Oh, glad and relieved that you are getting FL into the hospice, so sad that it is needed. Hope there are a few more crying/cuddling times to come for you. Such a hard time, my heart goes out to you. You have been so stalwart in your care and love for FL, Roo--you have done everything as it needed to be done. Now I hope for you a time of peace and connection.

Sadie said...

*hugs* I hope that today went well, and FL is comfortable and safe in the hospice now.

Jennifer Hill said...

Oh, bless him. So sad for him, and you of course, but so the right thing. You are both very brave. He's so lucky to have you, and you him, of course. I am curious to know the subject of his book? My very best to both of you. Jen

Star speckles said...

Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with you both. I think of you often, and I wish there was anything we could do.

Keep on keeping on

xx

CarolS said...

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Catherine Cottingham said...

Empathy, kindness and compassion. These you deserve. So glad the doctor has recognised how wonderful we all know you are. Kindest thoughts and prayers.